May 2013
marielikestodraw:
pahnem:
mercuriesrising:
aparticularlygoodfinder:
Go to Starbucks. Order coffee for “Prisoner 24601”
When they call out your order, jump up and yell “My name is Jean Valjean!”
And if the barista replies with “AND I’M JAVERT,” you tip that motherfucker so hard
you tip them right over the edge of a bridge
you fucking didn’t
oh my god.
gamsee:
how do you start a conversation with someone without sounding lame do you just be like Hey man how many cool scooter tricks can u do
moltres:
prince charming from shrek 2 = jaime lannister?????????
ifuckedmadsmikkelsen:
suchagaymer:
jerkidiot:
if you eat a chicken and egg sandwich, you’re basically eating one thing at different times of its life
like when you eat a baby and an elderly person at the same time.
staff:
magsby:
petition for tumblr staff to leave
we don’t want to be here anyway
david karp holds us hostage
send help
thedramaticsneeze:
hoshigumayuugi:
i actually like being up early i just don’t like getting up early
YOU PUT THIS IN WORDS
monomi045:
The Hannibal fandom tho like they came outta no where one second everyone was just
and then
egberts:
sodamist:
egberts:
i think my cat is allergic to cats
That sounds pretty Catastrophic
i hope you get arrested for that
snazziest:
I must master the elements Earth Air Water Fire Swag
iwilleatyourenglish:
iwilleatyourenglish:
once my baby was being really annoying so i put it in the basement but then i forgot and decided i didn’t want my basement anymore so i got rid of the door and then decided to do the rest later and when child protective services came they couldn’t get to my kid so they just wandered around my house
i’m talking about the sims please don’t call the...
kanyewesticle:
when people call me by my name and not my url
here have a friendship bracelet
queendread:
I don’t understand the USA, all your roads are straight and all your cities look like they were planned using Excel.
Everyone knows the only way to build a city is to wait until a bunch of tiny villages merge together over centuries and create a sprawling clusterfuck of winding roads that make no sense and have no street signs and are impossible to navigate unless you’ve lived there...
